Sunday, February 16, 2014

Birds in My Belfry

While earlier in my life, I would have been considered a Crazy Cat Lady, in my later years, I appear to have chosen birds.

Now birds may seem to be idle loafers who do nothing but throw seed and incessantly chirp your temples off to lobotomy land all day long, but in reality, they have quite Purpose Driven Lives and Big Important Jobs they do in order to earn their toys and seed.

When I first knew my cockatiel Corky, for instance, the woman was a logger. She buzz sawed impressively through a seemingly quite sturdy top perch log in less than a week. No amount of cuttlebone or calcium block material would distract her from this important task. Not long after though, she became an expert laundry woman, methodically stripping off cage newspaper and cleaning it in the laundry dish (meant for drinking, but let's not split feathers over it), soon earning a raise to wallpaper design/interior decoration by plastering the washed remains onto her walls. I believe lately she may have entered retirement and passed the legacy of Hard Work on to the parakeets.

Lollipop also does a hell of a lot of laundry and wallpaper plastering. However, she's also going for the gold in the Olympics, swan diving and swimming in water dishes even out of season. Once attaining that lofty gold medal platform, I believe she'll be off to Professional Escape and Aviator status, having recently created several unique flying patterns in order to evade her captors. She also has achieved Clearing the Bowling Ball from the Bowling Alley Toy and Clearing the Mirror from the Bird Carnival Toy- and has applied to several pet toy manufacturers as a Strength Tester. Lollipop's understudy, Piper, has yet to find her first job, but then she is still a young child.


  1. OK this is FUNNY! I love the descriptions of the various jobs, and it made me grin from ear to ear. Thank you, this is a wonderful blog, I hope to see more.

  2. Sheeeeeee's baaaaack!!! And once again with life imitating, laugh producing wonderfulness (if there is such a word). Joy!

  3. I just don't feel right calling you Grandma hahaa. But thanks

  4. Replies
    1. Doing my clicking, trying to make up for time I lost when sick. And the fact I bought jewelry. Will get the new one done this week. Thanks for caring Kenny!